I know what this is now…..
At first I thought it denoted that I was destined to be some underworld Goddess as mentioned here but I was wrong…..
It is what I now know to be some type of “god self” that gets edtablished to “rule over you” while you live in a particular timeline. It acts as your intuition and sets out your life path based on a particular timeline. Think of it as your Soul contract! Mines is composed of bees – I thought those were devoured Souls from ‘wokeing as discussed above -which goes back to what I was mentioning of how bees act – for me – as harbingers of bad news and “saving me” from it. It’s also why folks I notice look irritated by my presence.
Mines is a timeline wrought with tragedy and trauma and I always knew I was stuck in a bad timeline ever since I was small and I am finding thru my spiritual evolution that this shit is near impossible to change.
I got some really bad shit on me. The other day I felt that surge of energy in my neck (I realise it is a reptiliam entity attachment that was causing that that looked very much like this drawing here of how reptilian possession looks):
– Making it impossible to fight an urges imposed upon me.
Ted Bundy perfectly and eloquently elucidated just how that shit works….
People don’t know what true possession is. This type of possession as shown in The Exorcist and The Emily Rose film is rare…..
True possession is when you are fully aware of what is going on but you are no longer in the driver’s seat (though the entity taking over is using your body to do the dastardly deeds). I have had this happen following a drinking urge in which I can literally feel something overcome me on the right side – always happens there as it is the seat of your creative aspect and where your intuition mainly operates out of. In one instance a brother saw a black ooze cover me on that side.
It does something to hijack my intuition and take me on a regretful ride that always ends in regret.
The other day I had this happen and I apologise. It’s not me. It’s way out of character. This is something I believe I picked up or may have been initiated the second time I became a satanist, after being forced into it due to a reptilian putting a stranglehold on my money.
I can’t do shit until I get rid of that mofo.
You feel helpless and extremely self loathing after it (I can’t imagine how things go for those who don’t know what the fuck is happening.).
It controls your mind thru your intuition. I have been in fights, raped, sexually assaulted, taken advantage of while doing, saying dumb shit that is not me and is not indicative of my character. It possesses folks to do dumb shit I am finding out like the other day and because I am not in full control of myself during these body hijackings, people conclude it is my fault but, trust, when I would ‘woke people in the past I was literally passing on these cursed entities onto them.
People would be wobbling, looking crazy. As one lady said no one could last a day in my shoes, not all these assholes who shun me, talk shit on me, say shit – none of em.
That said, on to this “god self” thing I am grappling with. It is a very sinister thing to combat. I have tried cleansing it, bathing it in white light (Imma test that more later on), replacing it – doing what I can do to destroy this demonified thing that literally has me stuck to a tragic and horrific timeline so full of pitfalls and tragedy.
Everyone was saying how happy they were so I could have a minivan so I could stretch. It is killing me this mofo isn’t working and I am stuck with something that won’t do shit. Before I coulda had a nice newer 2008 Dodge Caravan but this kid – who is like in the deep throes of reptilian possession – he won’t even acknowledge it and his whole family rejects him (which proves what I observed about him) – gave me this vial of health drink and because my energy was not protected at the time (this where the white light protection comes in) – my friend’s keys got caught in his vehicle and he could not vote on the $1000 car at the auction.
That pissed me off and now I am stuck with this raggedy joker purchased from a dude with a joker entity on him who warned me about it but I was convinved that since it runs it would be a simple rehab. Big mistake…..
Shit! It is those synchronicities I talk about – shit coming together, conspiring to keep me fucking materially and spiritually miserable. I mean I got (but I cleansed myself of most of em) possessing spirits in me that I believe got incorporated into me when I was becoming a satanist and even a good number there at birth, waiting to sabotage me.
I do better, thrive then – bam ?? I get hit with an alcohol urge, unraveling my spiritual work I did on myself to make things better for me and for my family and others.
The thing is these alcohol attacks happen RIGHT as I am spiritually improving and on the precipice of reaching my full spiritual potential.
I gotta get rid of that shit once and for all.
It is fucking frustrating and let me tell you how powerful this shit I am fighting is:
She said at one point they were really pissed at me for breaking free ?
– And that was during the time I was looking for the minivan, hence why all that bad egregious unusually terrible luck occurred!
That said just recently when I stepped on the toes of a very powerful reptilian – the same one I spoke of here…..
– This shit happened early this morning after I put a white light of protection around me and I felt daylight being delayed – again – though I could hear birds chirping and it was black as fuck…..
One night this week when I was fighting a very powerful entity – that one I believe ?? – I felt something rock my minivan, like an earthquake, like someone or something shaking it. I went to ask some folks across the street if they heard anything but they didn’t……
I then could hear this skeletal crossroads demon (might be beelzebub) who is an archon who I have spoken of here…..
This a very powerful mofo….. – That’s why it ain’t easy breaking free…..
say to another spirit, “Hey, we gotta try another way to get her” and that is when I succumbed to my worst alcohol urge to date, got taken advantage, scaring poor people. I am sorry, I am truly sorry……
That said, after succumbing to that – they got these folks across the street who I heard one night a dog’s death holler derive (makes me wonder if they into some type of voodoo). Anyways in ambient sound I can hear voices coming from there (it happens with folks who are possessed in some way) and I went across the street and – nothing. I did see a ying yang symbol be made out of the clouds and the moon.
Here is why I say what I say: I can tell when I hear their regular voices they got some animosity towards me – the girl, it’s jealousy. After forming the white light protection around me I swear I heard what sounded like one of the people from over there run across at the speed of light and say in a frustrated, pissed off manner, “We gotta get this bitch outta here.”
Bitch I been here longer than most these mugs – since 2018.
That said this could be a case of astral projection coming from them – you also got folks whose souls are straight reptilian cause when I ask my third eye who made that voice I saw a sorta dog (coulda been the one they sacrificed causing that yelp sound I heard Friday night) face wearing a band/general uniform then form into a human – a wendigo.
It could be something else as well.
After forming the white light of protection around me (I shouldn’t have any more problems and I wish I woulda been did this) I had a series of experiences in the astral where people – as I have discussed before – were attacking me mainly with guns and I deflected every. single. one of them.
One was a young homeless confused light skinned black girl and we were in the tropics – I snatched her gun away and shot her – and another involving an old white man coming from out my childhood closet. He tried to shoot me and my parents and I snatched his shit and blocked him.
Here is the worst: me and my family were cleaning our home and garage (symbolism). I remember Nirvana the band being a big theme here as he was very forward thinking and against sexual assault – resonating with my recent experiences. Kurt Cobain was revered as a god. That said as we were packing up and moving stuff out my baby brother whi transitioned in 2012 was in his toddler form and he was carrying a box full of beehives that looked like porcelain ladybug homes and when he deliberately dropped em (his baby form seems to be bad based on what I have seen of him) on the den floor, out came these hornet bees and roaches and I killed every. single. one that I could see but seems the rest disappeared into the walls (which is symbolic).
This connotes to my long drawn out battle with Beelzebub, an ars goetia demon that controls insects and is “lord of the flies”…..
– There he is putting implants in me…..
See why this shit is near next to impossible to fight? But the white light – which feels heavy for some reason (I saw what it was and I’ll explain a lil later) – gives me a fighting chance. I also use it to protect my other material assets.
I also kept getting shown this necklace which I used to have – which someone gave to me – and I just saw recently a bunch of folks wearing which is a Native American feather with calcite in it…..
I told my third eye to form a white orb barrier of protection which evicerates into non existent anything getting near it that is esp. demonic, low vibratory and with ill intentions towards me.
That being said, about this “god self”…..
Damn…. just saw what created it – a wolf looking demon…..
It is something created in the matrix by the demiurge to enslave Soulled people. I have thought of doing something called quantum jumping which is a real thing…..
Quantum jumping is when we literally change our timeline to what we feel is a better one. Every decision we make each sec as explained by Hugh Everett sees us branching off into a new timeline and si thus an alternate version of ourselves.
I wanted to branch into a timeline where everything is the same but, except I acquire an electrical motorized minivan (fuck gas ???), money easily comes to me, I have wealth and fame, and people are nicer and I have better interrelations with people. Most of all none of these entities fucking with me here will be there to fuck with me.
I could feel a difference in my brainwaves, I opened more, was more expressive. It feel good (guy even gave me a $20 to look after his rig). Problem is I abandon folks over here.
I don’t really wanna abandon this timeline cause I don’t wanna abandon family, folks I love (who may get wholesale attacked by this shit once I leave) but I just want – and deserve – a better future.
Through my tarot cards and thru my third eye I saw that I might get killed this week. Last week I saw myself getting another vehicle, draped in Beelzebub’s bees which would lead to the wreck that was supposed to happen. A lack of optimism cause – let me just say it: this timeline a fucking wreck.
Look! I never wanted a normal life, 5 acres, family, etc. I like the challenges here but when you got a plethora of hidden hands coming from very powerful spirits orchestrating to keep you down regarding shit you have no control over like with the minivan (I tried using my third eye and all to avert it) – that’s fucked up! It is like this shit is leaving no wiggle room to even fight back, fairly.
It seems the white light protection is working tho. ??⚡
You try to work your way up and very powerful shit keeps you down seems to be how this timeline works.
Now that I am trying to use my spiritual gifts to manifest my desires these mofod have really been kicking up the heat of opposition against me.
I also know why after drapping myself in the white light why it feels heavy…..
The connection to this (I don’t know how) is why…..
I actually removed it off my crown chakra and I felt a difference.
That mofo is tenaciously still trying to attack me by attaching itself to me. It feels like it is connected to the right side where there is spiritual leakage in the hips (I have seen this before where folks facing great adversity are leaking there).
I used my third eye to see how my life will play out and it will just be more of the same – slight optimism but still struggling, etc. and confined!
I wanna be free as my Soul should be. I don’t wanna be confined or enslaved to shit.
I am thinking of draping it too as well in white light as well to give myself a fighting chance (I saw it will work for a sec but then turn into a hungry demonic dog faced head with that band/general cap I spoke of earlier ??)!
I saw that perfect timeline and there was nothing there but me and a better, healthier glowing version of me. Smdh.
I guess this is what the shaman here describes as your personal underworld:
In the current timeline mines filled with people, insects, demons, reptilians – it’s a disaster.
I gotta break free of this shit. The white light protection is a start: