I just wanna say for the record, if you feel your life SUCKS, READ THIS from Reddit:
THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST STORIES I EVER. READ! It’s like a composition of the Mist and like – this guy HAD TO HAVE visited a parallel world like this I sense in his dreams (the writer that is, NOT the character Clint Rockwell) cause it is TOO VIVID, too detailed – a whole lotta shit! Just read it – no matter WHAT you may go through here it makes you appreciate that YOU. ARE. HERE and not that HELLISH ASS WORLD!
It was very weird…
I wanna say that yesterday – it was sooo weird – I was attracting white dudes like crazy! One even look like Thor, shit! When I thres cards I saw the Emperor which correlates to Thor and I know when he is around that is the effect that will occur. I spoke of him in the past trying to contact me here:
I don’t know why he picked me but I can definitely feel his influence around just like when certain gods are around and they give off a certain effect based on who they are, etc.
The other night I witnessed a strange “lights out” in Malibu where ALL THE LIGHTS for stretches of miles were turned off:
Also, look at this weird ass star I been noticing for a while now which will go up then go down which is OPPOSITE of what stars are supposed to do. It is also EXTREMELY BRIGHT!
* Must be an alien satellook ite
It kinda reminded me of how back when I was a kid there would be an eerie darkness that would prevade in the house in which we always suspected was an indication that aliens were around (my older brother got abducted by them and I strongly sense they manipulate alot of what goes on in my life as indicated by a young man who told me that aliens – including a giant dragon – visited him after he spoke with me since whatever is around people have a tendency to visit him after he encounters them)!
It’s even said that there is an alien base off of Malibu:
That said, the lights came back on but when they did they gave off an eerie eerie evil vibe like “something” was around, lingering…
I even saw this astral form that looked like the hatchet man silhouette used by the Insane Clown Posse:
That said, what you are about to see is what happens when you embrace your shadow self. I have been doing ALOT of metaphysical, energetic work, especially since last week! See, I thought my alcohol compulsions came from a “demon.”
Turns out, it was due to some deep seated issues from some of my past lives (I have been doing past life regressiona on myself since last week). When I did the work on myself – I noticed I was becoming more “whole” though I have some more work to do!
See, in one of em, I was a 14 year old Vietnamese girl who was raped and murdered during the Vietnam War! I saw that I was raped on a desk, there were about 4 white dudes with one looking like Jim Mora of the Saints – the old coach – and about two black men and I think 2 Mexican dudes. It was awful. Thank goodness I was emotionally detached while watching this! If I recall, the slit me with a knife. That trauma is what caused me to have turbulent emotions when I was a small child. I believe that alot of “mental illnesses” can be traced to past lives. It was like being on a ledge where in the middle is a turbulent sea of horrendous emotions which can take you under any minute.
Then I later on encountered a gentleman who I chilled with who produced some weed and a bottle of wine (that shit sounded funny to say, lol!)!
He told me that I am the reincarnation of Isis which judging by the pic below may be true (that’s Nefertiti’s shadow):
Look below for a side by side comparison:
And he wants to do something where he buys an old church on Martin Luther King Blvd and have me wear gold and have a setup where people place gold at my feet.
Now, of course I don’t trust this shit but what was interesting is that he said he found that wine bottle and he was instructed by the spirits to save it for me – aaand it happened to be my fav: Cabernet Sauvignon.
Another profound thing he said after I told him that I felt I needed to stop drinking so that I can spiritually evolve, he said, “That’s some white people shit!”
Alot of the miseries people face in their life is the result of denying your shadow self – the darker side of your Self, your Soul!
There is a reason behind why the illuminati says: “Out of Chaos comes Order.” To find your true Self, your whole Self you MUST go through the Dark Side of Your Soul to become Whole! That’s why they say: “A drunk mind speaks sober thoughts” CAUSE THAT IS THR REAL YOU without societal filtering, etc. See, to survive in society – most folks HAVE to wear a mask! HYPOchristianity and other mass mind control religions preach to go to one extreme and be perfectly good of which the New Agers took it and removed the word “sin” and replaced it with being “positive” which denies and ultimately negates a person’s humanity! A variety of em – different ones for different contexts. That is how we keep it functioning via cohesion. That is why people like me who are truly free HAVE to live on the fringes of society. No way in hell could I be able to pull of the shit I do or even think the deep thoughts I do if I lived in regular society.
That’s why alcohol is known to be one if the biggest vice – that and drugs – for geniuses.
– Truer words have NEVER been spoken!
I know why. It’s got nothing to do with escaping or really even entertaining (to some degree it was). All your greats – Hunter S. Thompson, Jimi Hendrix, Me (let me stahp, lol!) were drunks and druggies.
Let me explain my theory…
Okay, in voodoo there is a saying that you are feeding the spirits. Now, according to this site here, Sacred Serpent, EVERYONE has entity attachments aka astral parasites as I call it…
What I highlighted there is kinda what I am talking about…
I think it goes even deeper…
See, look at this channel here called EyeSpyTV and watch one of his videos:
NOTE how he states that everyone has these patterns showing the very entities within us, like they are our building blocks that gives us life, color. I also feel they may correlate to the multiple paths in life that we can take and the bigger they are – the more that shows how “locked in” you are to a certain timeline. I believe that they are technically atoms which form us and sustains us.
That said, getting back to the addictions which resonate with the root chakra hence why Cali-fornia (as in fornication) is named after the Hindu Goddess of Destruction, Kali (California is colored by the root chakra in the astral hence why people have alot of addictions here and the focus on materialism thus causing every third car you see driving down the street to be a lambo or porche, etc.), see, as I have said on numerous blog posts here – when you become spiritually conscious/ come into your own power, what you call “god” aka the Demiurge has encased in your body entities that will be launched to destroy your spiritual ascension and development. It also manifests in the form of normal people, attacking you, calling you crazy when you break free of societal programming – which is just the beginning! I recall when I first started my spiritual journey the first thing to go were the fake weave and blue contacts (I see ALOT of womben going natural). That said, when you try to spiritually evolve, you get shit attacking you designed to remind you that you are in a human body and, I think this is the Demiurge’s way of saying, “Fuck You!”, it is also a way of bringing about balance. I recall before the alcohol thing it was an addiction to sex. Back when I was even a young child I had this addiction to OBSESSING over negative LITTLE TINY SHIT people said/ did to me! Also I would obsess over whether they said something to me or not. I would also obsess over what to do the next they did something to me. I remember in the 4th grade (which was a turning point cause I was influenced to voraciously read encyclopedias due to meeting a real smart, genius level I.Q. having young girl named Bianca from Mexico – they are “exotic” to us where I come from – reminds me of when I went back to Louisiana over the death of my brother in 2012 I saw some Mexicans who I guess were part of the rebuilding effort [Yeah, they take FOREVER to do things there] “lounging”, shit more accurately CRASHING IN FRONT THE LIQUOR STORE) while at St. Simon Peter – the same school where the principal placed soap in a kid’s mouth – something about the energy of that place, I just went berserk and started fighting people, all my classmates and they all ganged up on me at the end of the year. However, when me and my bros went to St. James Major middle and elementary school, things got better and I met my most influential teachers including Mr. Lefroy who turned me on to Malcolm X and an English teacher who was Irish whose name escapes me was a feminist and a great science teacher. Unfortunately – and tears well up in my eyes as I discuss this – they both passed away from cancer when I was a child. There was also another science teacher named Mr. Gervovich (I don’t know if I am spelling this correctly and the kids would call him “Gerbil BITCH”) who I had a crush on who looked like, now that I think about it, looked like Deputy De Matteo out here! I remember once giving him a love letter and running back shamefully to my desk. I remember he looked puzzled and if I recall correctly he was fucking aroubd with me by play flirting and I was hiding my head cause I am shy amd shit. I would also daydream about sex – ALOT! This was even when I was 5, 8 years old. From that was a weed addiction (I don’t like that shit cause unlike alcohol it seems to have the effect of killing off my brain cells and making me dead tired and hungry which REALLY fucks with your money). Then it went to a cocaine addiction with lasted for a month and I NEVER BROUGHT MORE than I could afford which was $100 a week back when I was a successful sex worker making $1000 A WEEK! THEN CAME THE ALCOHOL! If I suppressed the alcohol urges, THEN THE FOOD URGES CAME (Tho. I don’t look like it!)! On a subconscious level I would “hear” an inner voice say: “Things are going to perfect which is why you must PURGE into the Darkness (it is that same Saturnian influence that caused Saturnalia which was a week long Roman holiday of binging and doing crazy shit including murder which the purge films are based off of). iI feel as I said before that these addictions may be to keep you from coming into contact with your Higher Self or maybe to bring about balance…
As said by your boy, Darkness, in the 1985 film by Ridley Scott named, “Legend”, he states that there must be a balance:
That’s why opposites attract (the New Age BS that light only attracts light is bs and even this new age site confirms it while simultaneously contradicting themselves):
Here where that New (C)age BS site says the light actually ATTRACTS evil dark entities…
To saying that it REPELS THEM…
SEE how full of shit they are????
We live in a UNITY-verse of duality: even the god of this UNITY-verse, the demiurge, manifest this by being depicting as having the head of a lion and the body of a snake which represents the two primordial forces – the carians who begot the reptilians and the lyrans who begot us humans – that settled this UNITY-verse and incarnated into physical forms (the carians were bird people and the lyrans lion people).
That’s why it’s said reptiles (reptilians) come from birds!
The Baphomet also reps this duality by having the breasts of a womban and the body of a man!
That said – and this is strange – I notice that after drinking I look more youthful and it increases my psychic ability – even temporarily. In short, it has a weird effect! My memory becomes sharper and my vision goes beyond 20/20. I don’t know why it has these weird effects on me but it does!
THIS – HAS GOT – TO BE MY FAVOURITE PICTURE OF ME DRINKING:
Look like it can be in a commercial for Jack E. D’s!
Here another: 2nd runner up!
LOOK AT HOW I LOOK HERE: I LOOK FUCKING POSSESSED:
– Them fucking eyes…
BUT – notice how I look here while drinking:
I look REEEEAL natural and pretty, too, like the alcohol “beautifies” me! I still look like I am in my 30s but a more beautifully enhanced version of me!
Here more pictures (I take good pics):
Had to throw this in there…
Here I look like a natural white girl or shall I say womban…
Here I look like a high yella pretty sista from insta-hoe-gram all made up…
Here it’s like I got the skin of an insta-hoe model…
…Except I DON’T wear makeup and don’t use filters…
I don’t know why alcohol does this but it makes me look prettier (it could be my soul shining through since I get the same effect when I am having a natural high)!
But look here!!!!
Look how young I look!
– Look how dark the eyes are. Makes me wonder…
Like a child, between 15 to 18!
Here I look young (in the last one above and the ones below I wasn’t drinking but it was after doing some spiritual work on me)!
That is some real shapeshifting shit! They say pics – esp. cellpphones nowadays which can double as black scrying mirrors for spirituality as discussed here:
It makes me wonder – going back to the lady who stated that WE ALL HAVE ENTITIES – it reminded me of a Time magazine 1999 article I read stating that WE ALL HAVE VARYING DEGREES OF MENTAL ILLNESS in us via genes.
Here is a link to the article (it ain’t the Newsweek or Time article but was the basis for it):
What if the entities add that extra flavour that gives us our personalities, etc. just as those varying degrees of mental illness genes are said to do! It’s a thought. It could be to keep us in this Earthbound prison OR to just add colour to our lives, that balance…
– Another thing I wanna say about this is that, okay, a friend of mine commented that I look between 15 and 18. The reason why I bring that up is because it was around that age (at 16 approximately) that I made my “deal with the devil.” It was also around that time – and let me frank – that after watching “The Devil’s Advocate” and seeing how Keanu was able to kill himself and go back in time and taking cues from it, I got the brilliant idea to take beaucou (a Vietnamese word I grew up hearing in my household in this life) tylenol pills to commit suicide so I, too, could go back in time and change high schools (go to De La Salle than Xavier Prep which is now St. Katherine Drexel). Instead – I was still alive (it took ALOT to do that cause I didn’t wanna make my enemies happy and my family sad but I had ulcers every day cause of that shit, etc.). I also had a kundalini awakening in which ALLL the knowledge IN THE WORLD – THE MULTIVERSES – CAME TO ME AT A LIGHTENING SPEED RAPID PACE! I JUST COULD NOT STOP THINKING!!! I WAS OVERWHELMED, BESEIGED WITH OTHER PEOPLE’S ENERGIES (I became a Super Empath) and so thus that is why that silly ass comment that chemistry teacher said which was to “drop the English accent” with her satanic ass bothered me and caused me – I wonder if it was a spell? – to suppress my right side! See, everything happens for a reason… that HAD to happen so I can awaken to my powers and control em (that is why I say just as I saw in another person’s situation that trauma opens up the portals that exist within us known as chakras and why it is said – THESE ARE FACTZ – that adversity helps one to spiritually grow and through that process I am being honest like I am now!). I came out stronger and still able to maintain my powers, my abilities, be intuitive etc. but be emotionally stronger which is why I can handle the adversity I face like it is nothing even now, which is why I have a thick skin.
I say this to say that the reason why after drinking I look so young like right here:
It’s that part of me from high school I guess trying to come out, which explains why alcohol as an elixir brings that shadow self, wild self of me out as so many other folks experience. It could be said that that is my inner child but I strongly feel that this was the part of me which you see physically manifesting that was in a way “abandoned” back in high school.
It’s funny cause my craving came RIGHT AFTER I mastered astral projection the night before!
That said, I know of another psychic with a drinking issue (mines seem to be every 3, 4, 5 days – hers is EVERY DAY!). The purpose of alcohol as a matter of fact is to separate the spirit from the body! That’s why I sense why my intuition conveys to me to drink it! I also wonder if it is designed to be an obstacle for me to overcome (since IT IS destructive) to prove how powerful of a spirit I am by overcoming it? I also notice that when I come to terms with it, embrace it, I don’t experience negative shit like most people do after a drinking bout!
That said, here are all the crazy things I did yesterday!
Here is a police informant and illegal Canadian BOASTING of how he has turned people into the police, alot of the homeless, lol!
Here the cops showing up:
Here he is, telling on himself and all…
– Look at his furry ass, lol!
Here the cops showing up (they were mad nice and one of em I did that bs copwatching years ago on looked at me like “wtf???” – lol!):
– That day was mad crazy!!!!
…Someone gonna turn his ass in to ICE!
Now, for the last one – someone said they heard me screaming for help which was not me since I was dead knocked out tired. Nice of them to check things out!
That said, later when I woke up early in the morning at around I think 3 or 4, I heard what I can only describe to be a demonic spirit mimic shouting! That is probably what they heard. This forest here gives off a strange and spookh vibe! Real evil one.
Not only that – to go to show you that there is a SPIRIT causing shit – last night I heard a spirit while in the hypnagogic state bang TWICE on the hood of my car and make a hissss sound! It was fucking weird (Now my phone is acting weird)!
Now, to discuss all the shit I did – taking into context EVERYTHING I SAID – it means I got ALOT of inner work to do – maybe not as much as others cause I KNOW and to some degree embrace my inner demons (just need to get better control of them like many folks have to). As I said, when I drink, I REMEMBER EVERYTHING – my vision goes BEYOND 20/20 where I am seeing with my third eye but it seeme the other part of me that yearns to be free takes over and it is hard to control it cause it seems to be under the auspices of control of my intuition which damn near makes it impossible. I am starting to integrate that shadow self that I feel was the suppressed right part of me that I lost in that high school incident (note how I look the same age when and after drinking that I did when the incident took place which was between 15 to 18 during the most significant parts of my life when major spiritual transformations occurred). But I can’t let these destructive urges, impulses CONTROL ME! I got to control it and do shit WITHOUT ALCOHOL so I don’t do crazy shit at my or anybody’s expense. It’s like the right side of me gets cut off when it comes. That is why it is IMPERATIVE I do more work on me. This is not a normal urge or the normal conventional reasons (boredom, escape, entertainment) folks do em for. It’s spiritual and most spiritual folks understand the concept of “feeding the spirits” such as those who practice voodoo. Is it a separate demon (after writing all this my pineal gland just got lighter) as this young woman here kinda hints to:
…Or is it in me? One thing tho. is I NEVER NOR DO I BELIEVE IN PRETENDING TO BE SOMETHING I AIN’T! I put my shit out there cause it is mostly therapeutic and hopefully others can learn from it when I find a solution. Even more so, I peep that when I write shit out just by simply writing shit out I sometimes get a whole new perspective on things I wouldn’t if I were to just think it or even say it!
Here all the stuff I did after the fuckery ie embracing my Shadow Self: