I FORGIVE HIM!
I did a video a while back on this which was hard to do but due to some memories resurfacing independent of any “outside” manipulation, I felt the need to do the video you see down below:
That was a very hard thing to do, to put “family” if I could call those people that, out on front street. See, I believe in airing “personal business” as a therapeutic measure cause some people need to be put out there on front street. For instance…
This is my oldest HALF “brother”, Kerry!
He is a sexual predator who I RECOGNIZE WILL BE A THREAT TO OTHER PEOPLE IN THE FUTURE, Hence why I am warning this young lady here (I won’t put her identity out for her OWN PROTECTION) about her child, who seems to be the same age when KERRY raped me (about 5).
See, now that I am older, memories are resurfacing. Prompted by a show I was looking at on the “Crime Files”, I observed an episode where a serial killer and RAPIST went around, fucking raping women (about 3 with two of em I believe being young girls about ages 12 and 15). With that said, I remember: WHY DON’T THEY JUST BITE THEIR DICKS OFF as Don Lemon said. But then I thought, as a memory resurfaced – and kept resurfacing – that my – I refuse to call this NIGGER a fucking “BROTHER” EVER AND I HOPE SOMEONE KILLS HIM FOR THE SAKE OF HUMANITY – that he attempted in one of the episodes where he held me down – steadfast – which actually set the stage for how I LIKE to have sex – at one point attempted to and if I recall correctly insert – I think successfully – his penis into my mouth. I kept thinking of a repressed memorry as the first incident of rape was NOT highly traumatizing – it was just – as I recall, just being held down and having him insert himself into me. Strange thing is, I don’t know if the hymen at that point can be repaired on it’s own (I lost my virginity and felt it break at age 19), but it didn’t break till later in life when I finally lost my virginity. Anyways, this POS – I remember – went on I believe strongly to fucking STICK HIS DICK INTO MY LITTLE BROTHER – KRISTEN’S MOUTH – as well and I do kinda feel guilty about it, about not defending. I even recall AFTERWARDS playing with my lil brother’s penis. I am saying this to say – I need to talk on this as a therapeutic measure as these memories keep creeping back to the surface, mostly namely today and unprompted, with that said, into my adult years – as I have known people who are on cocaine – this mofo is STILL a predator as I noticed that he once stared at me with the lustful eyes of a fucking RAPIST, eyeing his fucking prey, while I stayed at his place. Another memory I have – I am not sure if it is a nightmare or not – but one, night I was coming back from bourbon Street after DRINKING HEAVILY. With that said, Marquee, his “step son” at the time (his mama’s sweet), who had been hitting me – if this was NOT a fucking dream/ nightmare, I recall “waking up” and seeing him on top but this could of easily been a night terror facilitated by those thoughts of lack of protection! May I also mentioned that Marquee later on got accused of rape and of course, Kerry downplayed it! He, Kerry and Marquee, BOTH NEED TO BE FUCKING CASTRATED! In addition to incest, I sense an empty soul devoid of compassion. A young lady has tried to reach out to me NUMEROUS TIMES to explain and make sense of the gap that is that POS trying to stay with her as they have a “child together.” I have no emotions, no connections, no ties to these fucking people. I severed it a long time ago. I moved to California, as far as I could TO GET AWAY FROM THEM, hence why FOR YEARS, even down there in Louisiana, I changed my fucking name to MASTERSON cause I want no ties. These people are fucking sick! I WILL NEVER FORGET HOW MY “MOTHER” – THAT BITCH – HOUNDED ME FOR NOT TAKING MY FUCKING RAPIST – KERRY – TO MY FUCKING PROM (WHEN I HAD NO DATE)! THESE PEOPLE ARE SICK! I will admit, when this happened, my mom took action and my father, MY BIOLOGICAL, REAL DAD – WHO I GREW UP WITH AND RAISED ME – BEAT THAT NIGGER’S ASS (my dad is not HIS biological dad – his biological dad is a fucking crackhead, a fucking dope fiend who he went to stay with and who BEAT HIS ASS). Unfortunately, perversions like this go on in MANY BLACK AND JEWISH HOMES but people keep “mum” to keep yup appearances and I am hoping too EX[POSE THIOS TODAY SO THAT IT MAY HELP MY OWN FAMILY BY BRINGING THIS ALL TO LIGHT!
ASs an indidgo child, look it up, this started ctreeping back in my fucking mind as I started to think of why and my purpose for being here, hence why I like my occupoation and I don’t like to be around people. For a while, the whole sticking his dick in my moyth thing BOTHERED ME incesantly as I thought of that crime files episodee: “Why didn’t I do it?” “Why didn’t I prpotect myself AT LEAST by doing it?” Most idiots will rationalize that, “You wre a kid!” No, you old but young SOUL having ass fool – there are some people who are incarnated omn this Earth with wisdom BEYOND THEIR YEARS – which includes me. That is why I don’t fit in. I don’t wantbto. To do so is to numb WHO I AM just to sell MYSELF – my heart,. my expressiveness, WHAT MAKES ME ME TO TEH FUCKING MAJORITYER FOR A FUCKING PAYCHECK WORKING AT THE FUCKING DOLLAR STORE FOR NO FUCKING CHANGE. I like what I do cause I CONTROL WHO SEES ME! I don’t chase the dollar bill asall you DUMMIES WHO LOO DOWN UPON ME FOR WHAT I DO chase a fucking paltry paycheck from your “pimp” – the CEO – to make a FUCKING LIVING! I dom’t sell myself out to do a THANKLESS JOB WHICH I HAVE NO FUCKING CONTROL OVER! I don’t see everyobody as YOU ALL HAV ETO ESPO. IN FUCKING RETAIL! With that said, I like my job cause I don’t have to deal with the vast majority of IDIOTS who coprise this fucking world.
I hate a humanity and have always had a LONGING TO BE OFF THIS MOFO – but I won’t give you simple bitches and bastards the pleasure of leaving.
See, I am here for a purpose; it’s to call you mofos out on your shit. I do “soul searching” in myself to make sense of shit that went wrong and occurred in my past. With that said, this shit needed to be put out on front street (I also got some cops to put out on this mofo, too). With that said, I am NOT traumatized by the incident; for a while, I obsessed on the “sticking his dick in my mouth” part for the reasons mentioned there in above, but I am pretty fucking well adjusted. The thoughts you hear IS ME, not some crying child left in the corner subconsciously meant to deal with the psyche of a traumatic experience. I had a pretty well to do and actually HAPPY existence growing up – like any lil girl, I enjoyed playing Mega man games, street fighter and killer Instinct. I took Tae Kwon Do lessons over fucking gymnastics cause I saw it as being prissy.
Now, as for family, here is what happened via Christmas break:
Here are some text I received from Kerry afterwards…
Here are these NIGGER’S texts (I ain’t calling these NIGGER’S my family, ever – wish I had their number so you all could CALL THEY ASSES UP, DAMN) AND THIS WAS AFTER X:MAS BREAK! (This sick AFROCEN-TRICK BASTARD HERE THOUGHT WOULD BE FUNNY TO LAUGH AT AND USE AGAINST ME):
For a while, because of the sexual traumas I have faced through my life and years, I started to take action and become more outspoken and in the process in some cases become more sensitive maybe to a fault… I thought my brother Kristen touched my breast (he didn’t and I wouldn’t care of he did now). Looking back, I grew up in a naked household. I DO NOT AUTOMATICALLY ASSOCIATE CARESSING AND KISSING AND CUDDLING WITH FUCKING SEX. I grew up with a fairly healthy attitude towards the human body, hence why I can do this topless shit. With that said, my mother wrote in a blog here how she would cuddle and caress AND NIBBLE on my little brother’s ear (she told me she was sexually assaulted by HER brothers, too, when growing up). She also would jump on me (she was and still is very controlling and before I was forced – told – to leave the house this BITCH told me that I think what she wants me to do and absolutely, too, which is how she treated my little brothers which is why my baby brother. Bryan, is dead to this day) and has for bringing fucking issues of childhood sexual abuse such as when a fucking light skinned NIGGER fucking pinched my ass in the pool and my mom said: “Don’t go in the fucking water, didn’t I tell ya?” as if MEN have a fucking RIGHT to women’s bodies and we got to change what the fuck WE DO AND HOW WE DRESS TO FUCKING AVOID THEIR PROCLIVITIES (CUT THESE NIGGER’S DICKS OFF – INCLUDING WHITE BOYS WHO DO THIS!) That is why I focus on solely and germanly putting NIGGER’S INFO WHO DO SHIT LIKE THIS ON BLAST! That is why I have always had a focus – tho. I do NOT categorize myself a s fucking feminist as those bitches had their kids raised by my grandma while their crakkkas asses complained of being in the house and taken care of by their white husbands) – on female issues as I like to encompass girls and women in this – fuck that noise of focusing on “boys, too” – bitch, you go focus on that if you want to. With that said, I am hear to call attention to problems and shit that LONG NEEDED TO BE BROUGHT TO THE SURFACE! With that said, I am NOT here to be your fucking friend, I am here to call you out on YOUR shit when you do wrong so as to make the world a better place.
Here are the SICK excerpts from my THAT BITCH’S blog of her admitting to molesting my young brother who died, Bryan, while in bed with him as a GROWN MAN!
This was very hard to do. I know some people will torment me like this person, here, and use this as a point to attack me as that person, coontrainiscoming (simply because I am NOT attracted naturally to black men in the same vein sick assholes use childhood sexual abuse and trauma to attack those naturally born as gay) did here but I feel it is important- for myself – to speak on this. No one has ever looked out for or protected me so it is up to myself to do some spring cleaning for my soul!
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